It’s the final countdown

This is it, it’s my last month of being able to say I’m in my 20’s, I’ll have to upgrade from some tick-box categories to ensure I tell the truth about my age, no longer will I be able to put a mark in the box next to ‘aged between 20-29’, I’ll have to keep scrolling to the next one down. I’ll also be officially classed as old by people who are still at school and as I’m still single, I’ll wonder if I’m about to be shelved. However they say 30 is the new 20 so that’s what I’m holding on to. The last few years of my 20’s have brought a new found confidence, not only to my personal life, but also my work life. Yes growing old isn’t nice to think about, but it’s also exciting. Think of all the knowledge you’ve built up over the years and how you can use this in retaliation to anything that anyone says to you.

Relationship wise I’ve learnt that you can’t judge a book by its cover and even if you don’t you still can’t be 100% sure he won’t screw you over. But that’s life, you live and learn and you know the saying, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger and this couldn’t hold more true. When life’s events throw you a curveball, allow yourself to wallow in self-pity for a bit, you need to deal with the emotions you’re feeling, however painful they are. The only way to get over these situations are to face your feelings head on – cry until it hurts, talk about it until your voice disappears and your friends are bored of hearing about it, have days in bed just watching TV and have some time to eat what you want without thinking about what that extra slice of chocolate cake will do to your waistline. The only thing you need to do is make sure you pull yourself off the ground to show your ex exactly what he’s missing. However hard it is to put on a brave face in public, just do it. It’s guaranteed to pay off in the end and you’ll be able to walk away with your head held high while everyone else wonders why your ex was crazy enough to let you go. Always believe in yourself and don’t let anyone doubt you.

Career wise I’ve learnt to push myself even if I get a few odd looks in the process. Take the lead and show your employer and colleagues exactly what you can do, even if it’s not in your job description. Stay late after work, always be on hand to offer your services in times of need and deal with tough situations in a professional manner, however frustrating it can get.

Family wise I’ve learnt to always put them first. Don’t let boys or work get in the way of family time, it’s moments that you’ll never get back with them and that’s something you’ll regret. Mum’s, dad’s, brothers and sisters can be annoying and argumentative, but those are the times you’ll fondly look back on when you’re older and that’s something you don’t want to miss out on. I’ve found that the basis for everything else working out in your life is to have a strong foundation and family form a great base to build on. If things go wrong in a relationship or times are tough at work, having a strong family behind you can give you the confidence to face up to the challenges and take charge of the situations you need to resolve. Use your family to bounce off and if I know all of this advice by the time I’m nearly 30, imagine how much your parents and grandparents know so always listen to what they have to say.

So here’s to life at 30, I’m mentally prepared to face any challenge that comes my way and that includes accepting more wrinkles around my eyes. Bring it on!

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The day you learn that your ex is seeing new people

The relationship’s been over for a couple of months now, although it wasn’t your decision to end it, your’re slowly coming to terms with what happened and each day is getting progressively easier. Then like a bullet hitting you in the chest, you hear from someone that he was seen out with a girl the other night at a local pub. Your first reaction is to ask whether she’s pretty, what did she look like, did he look happy? Then you just want to cry, and trust me, it’s ok to do this – I’ve cried far too much over my ex but it really does help. You’ll feel like you’ve gone back about 10 steps in the process of getting over him but you’ve not. What you’ve just done is jumped over a big hurdle in the seemingly never-ending emotional roller-coaster you’re currently riding. The moment that you’ve been dreading about hearing (him being with someone else) has been and gone and however hard it seems now, you’ve done it. You’ve heard the worst possible news that you could have imagined and you’re still alive. I’m not going to sugar coat it, they’ll be a lot more down days to come but one day the bitterness you feel will end, one day you’ll find someone else who’ll bowl you off your feet and life will make sense again. That’s something that you’ve got to get excited about, so keep that thought in your mind and never forget, there’s plenty more fish in the sea – go and explore!

No boyfriend but what’s the harm in looking at wedding dresses?

Call it cliche but I’ve always dreamt of the big, white wedding in a church surrounded by my friends and family. They say you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince and I’ve certainly got through my fair share. As someone who’s currently single and still waiting for the love of my life to come and sweep me off my feet, you’d think my dreams would currently be on pause or at least dented from my lack of harbouring a successful relationship. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth, I’m even more determined on planning the perfect day and see these single days as extra time to plan the wedding of a lifetime. I’ve got the time and drive to pick everything I want without anyone looking over my shoulder or criticising my decisions. Now I’m not suggesting that everything I pick will be set in stone, my future husband will have his say to make sure his personality shines through on the day – that would only be fair, right? This is just something that gives me a little faith in love and that one day I will get married to the man of my dreams and live happily ever after. By saying that, I’m not suggesting that everything will flow swimmingly without any hiccups along the way. It will be hard, relationships always are, but for one day everything will be perfect and that will always be something that I can look back on in the hard times. That’s what memories are for and anyway, life is short, why not have a blow out and celebrate one of life’s precious moments in style. So here’s to all the single girls who are waiting for their knight in shining armour. It’s ok to keep your dreams alive by planning your wedding day to within an inch of it’s life, aside from giving you something to do in all the extra free time you have (now that you don’t have someone else to look after), it will mean it will be less stressful when your proposal finally happens, meaning less arguments with your new fiance. Now where’s my shortcut to Jenny Packham’s website?